What have you been taught over your lifetime about Sex and Aging? What have you observed with parents and others older then you about sex and intimacy? No matter your age now, everyone has an attitude about sexual behavior as you mature. This attitude has developed over your lifetime by society, religion, parental education or lack of it and of course your culture. If your attitude, when you are young, is to think old grey-haired octogenarians no longer have sex, well that is what you are creating for yourself. And it is not true. Do not do that. The older you get the more sexual and passionate you can be.
Challenging your beliefs now, educating yourself now, no matter your age is one way to lay the foundation for a great sex life as you get older.
Women can go two different ways as they age. When women are in the phase of their life when they can get pregnant their DNA tells them to be careful, any full sexual encounter can produce a pregnancy no matter the birth control one is using. This limits their sexual freedom. When women mature and go thru menopause some decide it is time to kick up their heels and have some sexual fun because there is no chance of pregnancy or…..they have lost their sex drive due to menopause. Women need to be taught the largest sex organ they have is their state of mind. And, they may want to look into HRT, hormone replacement therapy, bio Identical. When you get older your hormones do not get you horney even with HRT. A woman can keep her vaginal walls pliable and juicy using Estriol. (you need a doctor’s prescription for this) so intercourse is not painful. With aging you can be more passionate, more skilled and you are not in a rush. Everything feels so good, why rush it.
Men would love to make love and keep their sexual play active until they die or they start having ED, erectile dysfunction. Then depending on their lack of sexual education they may close down because without a hard-on what good is getting turned on. (This is what one of my clients stated to me.) If they are with a woman who is also sexually uneducated and religiously repressed, she may only want intercourse, no oral giving or receiving and definitely no anal play. There are men who do not know they can have a full ejaculation with or without an erection and they can have an orgasm with no ejaculation and it feeeels wonderful.
So now we have a couple who through ignorance are missing a better part of their sexual life as they mature.
Men who are sexually educated and understand that bringing satisfaction to their partner and themselves encompasses much more than the male organ. It is a whole experience; body, mind and soul. If erectile dysfunction, delayed ejaculation or even early ejaculation begins with aging, this does not stop the educated lover. A man surely can check into these challenges to see if he has low testosterone due to aging and look into HRT for men. Or he may be dealing with a mental and emotional disconnect from his partner. I suggest he seek counseling with a sex therapist marriage counselor. He should bring his partner if he has one. And continue expressing his passion, desire for intimacy and sexual needs using his hands, mouth, body, mind, energy. And even his semi-soft cock can still experience tremendous sensations of pleasure for both him and her.
Women who are sexually educated have developed a good sexual attitude during their years of growing up. They have explored sensual pleasures that are not stamped and approved of by their upbringing. They have a challenged themselves to speak up in the bedroom and guide their partner in his desire to be a better lover for her. Yes, most men want to please their woman. Help her have an orgasm no matter how long it takes to “eat her pussy”. And I mean 20 to 45 minutes. This is the average time it takes most women. If you are reading this and your woman always says it takes too long…..then tell her this statistic and any amount of time is ok with you. If she says you don’t know how to eat her pussy then ask her to teach you. Same goes if she does not know how to give good head. Tell her how important it is to you and you will teach her. Start with whip cream or honey on your manhood and play with licking it off.
Men as some of you know, there are women who will not give you the one thing you would love to have and that is the intimacy and passion of her mouth on your cock. Same is true for women. You know there are some men who just will not go down on their woman with excuses that are not true. He just refuses to learn what pleases you. Remember you loved them and maybe still do. What are you trying to teach yourself? What is this relationship teaching you? How can you get your needs met when your partner in life refuses to be your partner in bed? You may need to come and see me as a Marriage Sex Counselor
The older you get the more passionate, sexually intimate and playful you can be. Stop buying into whatever is stopping you from being an expression of Great Spirit. Your genitals are an organ just like your lung, liver, heart, and kidney. They all are supposed to keep working until they all stop and you leave your body behind. Awaken your desire, fall in lust with life, and find a lover if you do not have a partner. In relationship or not, please keep self-pleasuring and making love to yourself. I invite you to Live life to the fullest. Be sexually alive.