Letting Sex Slip Out of Your Life
By Ina Mlekush M.A. M.F.C.C.

Are you over 50? Have you been married for many years and you love your partner but…

Do you have children, grandchildren, a nice home, financial commitments, plans for retirement and long deserved vacations? No part of you wants a divorce but…..there is no sex in your life.

Are you between 35 & 50 and have noticed not only is the honeymoon over, but your sex life has dwindled to almost nothing. You still want it but your partner is just not interested, too tired between working and the kids. Have you tried talking about it and nothing changes, except the subject? Are you being patient, loving and kind hoping that with time things will get back to normal?

You know the way it was 5 years ago? Well, do not hold your breath. Nothing will change unless you insist upon it and take control of the situation. That means committed communication, attending seminars on the topic, or reading one of the many books on sexology, for example:

• Kenneth Ray Stubbs PH.D., The Essential Tantra: A Modern Guide to Sacred Sexuality
• Erotic Passion: A Guide to Orgasmic Massage, Sensual Bathing, Oral Pleasuring (www.SecretGardenPublishing.com)
• Don Juan and the Art of Sexual Energy (InnerTraditions.com).

Are you between 24 and 35 and you have great orgasms but you’re not sure your partner does? Younger men sometimes (if not most the time) ejaculate too fast, while the partner is barely warmed up. Oh, your partner has said how much she enjoys having sex with you, but there are no rocketships for her. Suggested reading, “The Multi-Orgasmic Man” by Mantak Chia & Douglas Abrams (Harper-Collins).

You are doing everything you know but there are some things your partner just doesn’t like. They will give you oral sex but you cannot reciprocate. They will let you go down on them but will never touch your genitals with their mouth. They do not like anal stimulation of any kind even though they have responded with passion from this intimate touching. You feel inept. You love them and don’t know what to do.

With time sex slips out of your life. The years slide by and you do not know where they have gone, raising a family, career, home. All important things and sex, that amazing feeling two people cannot experience in any other way, is gone or slipping away unbeknownst to the blind lovers.

The soul and the body must have this life-giving mutual sharing of passionate intimacy. The body is an artistic expression of the Great Spirit. Education is the greatest weapon we have against ignorance, prejudice and dogma. It is the contamination of the mind, the social images, the repressive principals we have been taught throughout our life about sex and passion, the self-righteous false teachers that perpetrate sexual dysfunction under the guise of proper action, where the battle needs to take place. It is an inner battle.

You have a life to live. You are a spiritual sacred sexuality human being as the Great Spirit created you. Do not live your life without sexual intimacy. The soul bursts with vitality, healing you at a cellular level when you enjoy the passion of intimate touching. Break out of your box of fears and limitations and discover for yourself, not because your religion or I tell you, but because you have learned for yourself the true value of sexuality in your life.

Ina Mlekush M.A. M.F.C.C., Sexual Solutions. Ina is a marriage/relationship counselor resolving sexual problems, in private practice dealing with issues of erectile dysfunction, early or delayed ejaculation, loss of sex drive, aging, and teaching female ejaculation and non-orgasmic solutions. Mature men and women, you do not need to be without honest intimate touching. Resolve doubt and sexual insecurity, erectile dysfunction, premature or delayed ejaculation.